| “ | Guess it's better than some of your job ideas - like becoming an admiral. | ” |
—Mark, ""Business Secrets of the Paraohs"" | ||
| Business Secrets of the Pharaohs | |
|---|---|
| Series 8, episode 2 | |
| |
Episode details
| |
| Date aired | 2 December 2012 |
| Previous episode | Jeremy Therapised |
| Next episode | The Love Bunker |
Business Secrets of the Pharaohs is the second episode of series 8 and forty-fourth overall episode of Peep Show.
Summary[]
Jeremy shows Mark the pamphlet for Personal Invoicing Life Coaching.
Mark gets a lucky break when his book, Business Secrets of the Pharaohs, is accepted by a publisher. Jeremy, in an attempt to kick-start his career, enrolls on a life-coaching course.
Plot[]
Mark bores Jeremy with all his newfound knowledge about bathroom furnishings. Jeremy tells him that the more he hears about his job, the "more I feel quite strongly that I'd like to kill myself." Jeremy then proceeds to show Mark that he too has prospects as he is about to register for a weeks-long life coaching course tragically titled Personal Invoicing Life Coaching.
The Personal Invoicing Life Coaching pamphlet.
Later Mark goes to a club with her ex, Simon to celebrate the inauguration of Simon's new startup, which he has formed with pals Trish and Neil. Mark doesn't want to be there but feels he must to further ingratiate himself in his girlfriend's mind so that she will move in with him. Simon and his friends are only falsely interested when Mark tells them that he's now a bathroom furnishings salesman. Dobby rescues the awkwardness Mark by telling the group that he's about to publish his book Business Secrets of the Pharaohs. But Mark still manages to misappropriate this social salve. Dobby still waffles at the idea of moving in with Mark, this time citing Gerrard's death as the reason she needs to "seize the day," ostensibly over settling down.
At Personal Invoicing Life Coaching Jeremy meets Celia, a motherly-yet-sexy-cool master life coach. She asks if everyone has read through the course textbook that she had sent over email. Jeremy hasn't and when called on, he tells her that her core principles are "shit." Celia is somehow impressed with Jeremy's boldness.
Back at the apartment Mark and Dobby and celebrating Mark's book signing with BL Books (later to be revealed as British London), over a couple glasses of "sparkling, grape-style drinking wine." Dobby asks Jeremy how his first day with the life coaching seminar is going, and Jeremy says that he has to find a volunteer to practice on, which Dobby volunteers herself for. Mark is not impressed by this as he fears Jeremy will unduly influence her into not moving in and "follow her dreams."
At around midnight that evening Jeremy wakes up to see Mark making a coffee for himself as he is still cramming the last few revisions requested by the book publisher to make the release deadline. Jeremy sees that Mark is been in caps lock for "a few hours," and that the haphazard revisions may in fact be self-sabotage.
The next morning Jeremy and Celia violate the boundary of client-student relationship and have a lunch date together. Celia clandestine therapisation of Jeremy at the restaurant initially sways him into ordering a halloumi salad when he really wants a burger. Their sex later on in Jeremy's apartment involves a sharing of their mutual fantasies, of which Celia's is the wearing of a grass skirt made out of severed dicks.
Elsewhere, Mark is having a standing lunch at a lunch truck called Gerry's Pit Stop with his new publisher liaison, Greg. Greg is clearly fleecing Mark to pay for the seed costs but Mark is so in over his head at being attached to this publisher that he blindly accepts. At the apartment he shows the contract agreement between him and British London and even Hans and Jeremy can see that this vanity publisher is nothing more than a blatant scam.
A few days later Dobby is excitedly telling Mark and Jez about seeing Simon (and his business partner Trish's) new startup offices. She is so impressed she reveals that she has quit her job and joined their team. Mark sees this as a sign that Jeremy's free therapy on her is working against Mark's wishes. Back in the apartment Mark belabors over what sort of peanuts to offer at the book launch and Jeremy realizes that Mark is in the process of not just paying for the festivities himself, but transferring £2,000 to British London to print these books. Jeremy tries to stop him but Mark sees his meddling as simply jealousy. Mark sends the funds.
Later Jeremy goes to the Personal Invoicing Life Coaching induction ceremony and realizes he's the only one who didn't get a certificate. Celia says she cannot put her reputation on the line by certifying Jeremy as a life coach, her rationale being that Jeremy's perverse sexual fantasy is eating Celia's beautiful hair. Jeremy tells her she is going to be in "big, big trouble."
Jeremy's first day of school.
Dejected, Jeremy goes to Mark's book launch at the pub where he realizes Mark has finally come to the realization that he has been had. Mark's name is misspelled on the front cover and the books are "merely printouts" and not formatted like an actual book. Jeremy wants to tell him "I told you so,” but decides against it. Mark tells all at the book launch that he is a failure and that he will be suing British London.
Later, Mark apologizes to Jeremy for discouraging his career choice as a life coach. As a thank you for supporting him even though he had failed to recognize Jeremy's kindness, he goes back to Greg at British London (which we see is run out of a converted storage unit) and reveals that he has printed up a life coaching certificate for Jeremy. Jeremy is very thankful and impressed that his last name is spelled correctly.
Supporting Cast[]
- Mathew Baynton as Simon
- Nadia Cameron-Blakey as Celia
- Charlie Covell as Trish
- Tim Downie as Greg
- Patrick Kennedy as Neil
- Rakhee Thakrar as Waitress
Uncredited Co-stars[]
- Paul Warren as Paul (Supply Teacher)✝︎
- Unknown performer as Pam✝︎
- Unknown performer as Gerry's Pit Stop cook✝︎
- Unknown performer as Gary✝︎
✝︎ non-speaking part
Trivia[]
- Mark first mentions that he is writing a book called "Business Secrets of the Pharaohs" in Mark Makes a Friend. He tries to show Alan Johnson the book only to find his laptop is no longer working (as a result of Jeremy and Super Hans using it in the bathtub whilst he was away).
- Dobby mentions her friend Alice who has a therapist to recommend in this episode. It is unknown if this is the same Alice who is Neil's wife, who we briefly see in the episode The Love Bunker.